Dear Homeowner; Things not to do At Your Appraisal Inspection
For me, the new year is a time to do some organizing and get things done that I’ve wanted to get done for a long time, but I just haven’t had the motivation.
This year, I’m motivated to write a few articles about things I’ve been thinking about lately.
It seems like a popular topic for Bloggers in the Real Estate and Mortgage industry to write about lately has been; “Tips for homeowners to remember when the Appraiser comes out to inspect their house.”
I have a few things here for Homeowners to remember. These are all based on past experiences I’ve had doing inspections.
#1: Please pick up all the dog poop in your backyard. At the very least, please leave me a path to the rear of the backyard, where I can stand and take a picture of the rear the house, and a path that goes all the way around the house so that I can measure your house. While I will make every attempt to be as careful as possible, while I’m doing the “Backyard Poop Dance”, please don’t be surprised if I track something in.
#2: Please don’t smoke so much marijuana right before I get to the house. It’s not that I don’t believe in your right to do what you want to do in your house, however when I get a contact high, just from doing my regular inspection on you house, it sets my whole day’s schedule back because I have to find a 7-11 to pick up some snacks before my next appt. Also, I might forget about the valuable things I see in your house, like your gold plated kitchen faucet and fur lined toilet seats.
#3: Please don’t turn the sprinklers on right when I get to the house for my inspection. I do have to walk all the way around the perimeter of the house to measure it. Slipping and sliding in the mud at eight o’clock in the morning is not my idea of a good time.
#4: I know that you are a love machine…. but please put away the toys, implements, bottles of lubricant, magazines, videos, whips, chains and even the tastefully done portrait nudes of you and your spouse in various positions, so I don’t get distracted and forget my regular routine.
#5: Please make sure the locks to all the bedrooms in the house are unlocked. No matter how much you don’t trust the rest of the people in your house, I still do need to inspect every room in the house.
#6: Please put the toilet seat down. New regulations, a few years ago, required that appraisers take a photo of every bathroom and include them in the appraisal. The open toilets that are recently flushed are bad enough. But those unflushed ones…..
#7: Clean and tidy up, even if just a little bit. At least leave me a small pathway to get through every room. I’m sure that the television series, Hoarders”, was inspired by the experiences of appraisers in the field.
#8: Don’t rebuild your Harley Davidson motorcycle in the family room. There just isn’t any way to catch all of the oil and grease and I know I’m going to have to put in the appraisal, that there were grease stains on the carpet.
#9: Please don’t tell us that the property is complete and ready for a reinspection when it’s not. Having a stove sitting in the middle of the kitchen, the sink unplumbed, exposed concrete sub-floors and no paint on the walls, does not constitute a new kitchen.
#10: Please control your dogs. I know you told me Muffin, who is a 180 pound Pitbull/Presa Carnario mix, is as sweet as pie to your children, however I do get a little unnerved when Muffin is lunging at me, wanting to rip my throat out.
And please don’t smoke in the house, with your babies in the same room.
Let’s just follow all these simple rules, and the Appraiser’s life, along with everybody else’s, will be much easier.